DIAMONDHEAD, Miss. –- Everybody has a Katrina story in the cities of Bay St. Louis and Waveland. Most people are homeless, or at least forced into trailers or relatives' homes. They are frustrated by the endless red tape and anguished about an uncertain future in a region where recovery is measured by tons of debris moved, number of houses demolished and businesses back in business.
They are tired of FEMA trailers, tired of the bureaucracy, tired of the devastation, tired from worrying about money, their jobs and their children.
Elaine Oneto, who also lost her house, has a different perspective, wrought from another tragedy, one that, in her mind, has obliterated all the impact of the hurricane.
Her youngest son, National Guard 1st Lt. Robert Oneto-Sikorski, was killed Monday while on foot patrol near Al Haswah, an area west of Baghdad.
He leaves behind three children, ages 6, 8 and 11. Before his deployment in Iraq, the Hancock High School and University of South Alabama graduate worked as a mechanical engineer at the Northrop Grumman shipyard in Pascagoula, Miss.
Oneto-Sikorski, 33, served with the 155th Brigade Combat Team along with the children’s mother, Claire Rager, who is heading home this week on compassionate leave.
"My house is not salvageable," Elaine Oneto says matter-of-factly Thursday, sitting outside her sister’s home in this community near Waveland and Bay St. Louis. "I’m having the Corps [of Engineers] demolish it. I had it for 16 years. It wasn’t much, but it was my home."
She has distanced herself from Katrina and its impact. All she owns was in her car when she fled the city before the hurricane. "Possessions, things, material things, they are just so temporary, and transitory. They really are not that important," she says.
Now the mother is mourning her youngest son, recalling the conversation they had last Friday about his scheduled return home in December and his plans for his children.
"He was going to buy a home, make a home for them and they were going to go to Disney World. They were going to have the best Christmas they ever had," Oneto says, choking back the tears. "They were just everything to him; he just loved his children."
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May God bless you and your family and may your son live in peace with angles in paradise. Your loss is in our prayers and I hope that our words can bring some comfort to you in the days ahead. We thank you and your son for making the ultimate sacrifice for us. With love from Hawaii to the mother of a Hero.
Sonny Davis, Maui, HI (Sent Nov 4, 2005 2:55:50 PM)
To Elaine:
I'm sitting here staring at my computer, and most of all, after reading your story, I can't help but think that you must feel as if the world has turned on you somehow. It's probably difficult to hear people tell you that things will get better when all you really want is for them to return to how they used to be. I just want you to know that you are not alone in this, your story has touched many lives, and we will always continue to remember you, pray for you, and appreciate the sacrifice your son has made for ALL of us. Thank you.
Sabrina Milwaukee, WI (Sent Nov 4, 2005 2:55:59 PM)
I cannot even begin to imagine what you must be going through right now. Your son's wife and children will have many difficulties ahead however your love and your strenght will help all of you survive this horrible tragedy. Just know that there are so many others holding you in their prayers and wishing you sunnier days ahead.
Sheila Castledine (Sent Nov 4, 2005 2:56:13 PM)
YOUR LOSS HAS BECOME MY LOSS. I KNOW THAT THIS LOSS WILL NEVER EFFECT ME LIKE IT DOES YOU. HOWEVER, I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I WILL FOREVER QUIETLY MOURN YOUR WONDERFULL SON AND PRAY OFFTEN FOR YOUR RECOVERY FROM KATRINA.
LOU PROBO, LONG BRANCH, NEW JERSEY (Sent Nov 4, 2005 2:56:21 PM)
So sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your son with us.
Jane Doe, Seattle Wash. (Sent Nov 4, 2005 2:56:30 PM)
I just heard your expressions about your son and the things he expected to accomplish once he got home. I stand up to you for all your serenity and forbearance at a time like this. I can feel it in your voice as you speak. May God Bless you and your family and may He see you through this difficult time.
Lydia Lugo, Carolina , Puerto Rico (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:00:38 PM)
Bliss you and your son. I and my family appreciate the sacrafice, please never think he will be over looked for what price he and your family has paid. I hope in this tragic time you will find some peace knowing that we as Americans will keep you in our thoughts and prayers for what you have been through.
Marie Dundee, Manteca, CA (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:00:39 PM)
My heart aches for your loss. Your a very STRONG women. God bless you and your family. We Americans don't realize how much we take for granted our Country, or our lives till something bad happens to us or someone we love ... Take care Ms Oneto
Cindy Bowden, Zephyrhills, Fl (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:00:49 PM)
My deepest sympathy to you. My son was also in Iraq , it was the hardest year of my life. Everyday i worried and feared the worst. He came back ok and i thank god everyday. Iam so sorry for your loss. MY heart goes out to you. God Bless
Ingrid Wilhelmsonn (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:00:52 PM)
Thank you and everyone else whom has sacrificed their lives for my freedom and assuring that my 12 year old daughter Emily has all of the freedoms that we enjoy and making the future better for all children.
God bless you and condolences to you and your family
Ann Weber, Columbus, Ohio (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:01:08 PM)
I also am deeply sorry for your loss. To endure the ravages of mother nature must seem so trivial compared to the loss of a child. You and your family will be in my prayers this holiday season. I want to personally thank your family for sacrificing so much for my continued freedoms. May god bless you and grant your family peace.
Geremy Sanders , Tampa,Fl. (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:01:11 PM)
God Bless you and your son's wonderful children. They will always have a hero to look up to. I am so sorry for your loss.
Jocelyn, jersey City, NJ (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:01:50 PM)
My deepest sympathy to you and your family...I know the pain you are going through and what lies ahead for you. WE lost our son, not fighting for our country, but lost him just the same and you never get over that. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers and know there are people in this country that appeciates the sacrifice and mourns your lost. May God bless you and keep you safe.
Linda Rice , Laurens SC (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:01:51 PM)
My heart goes out to you and your family. I have a nephew scheduled to return home somethime this month and I pray he does. This is not our war...let the people in Iraq have their country back and give us back our soldiers. To endure a double dose like you have deserves something in return. I wish I had the means to give it to you because I would, without a doubt. We need to make sure that all the families that have lost someone in Iraq is taken care of and that everyone who has lost their whole life from Katrina and the other devasting hurricans, are also taken care of. Our government needs to put it's priorities in order. God Bless you....
Jo Capritta, Annapolis, MD (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:01:53 PM)
To fallen soldiers let us sing
Where no rockets fly nor bullets wing
Our broken brothers let us bring
To the Mansions of the Lord
No more bleeding, no more fight
No prayers pleading through the night
Just divine embrace, eternal light
In the Mansions of the Lord
Where no mothers cry and no children weep
We will stand and guard though the angels sleep
While through the ages safely keep
The Mansions of the Lord
Flags today in tribute wave
For those loyal ones who gave Of their youth,
their hopes, their might
For a cause they knew was right.
Morning bells sound their call,
Pause and say a prayer for all--
All who served valiantly
That men might be ever free.
Toll of bells, drums' slow beat--
Silence falls in every street.
In each heart swells the plea:
Keep us safe, but keep us free!
God Bless you Ms. Oneto. You are in this soldier's prayers.
Christopher Daniel, Jackson, Misssissippi (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:01:54 PM)
I'm not a person who can readily put his feelings into words.I can only guess at the pain you are going through. I wish there was some small way I could take some of it away..I feel that your grandchildren will give you the strength to carry on.For when you see them they will mirror everything that was good in your son.And he will live in them always.His kindness ,intelligence and duty will help them.My son is in the Air Force and we pray that he never gets the call.Be safe and well and our deepest sympathy to you and yours.
Larry Angeleri (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:01:55 PM)
There are no words. And you'll just have to trust when I say there are feelings.
collette clanton, Muscle Shoals area, Alabama (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:02:16 PM)
You have suffered such great losses. It was devastating to see the destruction that you, your family and neighbors have suffered. None of that can compare to the loss of the life of a loved one that you now face. My sympathy, and my thanks go out to you and to your son for the sacrifice you have made. May God grant you the strength to get through this and may the happy memories you shared live on forever in your hearts and bring a smile to you.
Anita Rose, Barrackville, WV (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:02:20 PM)
my prayers are with you and hope that time will make easier it for you . you have been tested to limted by losing home and son you stay strong and sooner or later good things will come your way
letts iowa (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:02:30 PM)
From one mother to another, my heart aches for you over the loss of your son. Please know that I appreciate the bravery and the work of your son to protect all of us and I know you must be very proud of him. My prayers are with you as well as all of those in our military. My niece is now serving in Iraq. Remember, "those who weave color into our lives leave us with a tapestry of beautiful memories."
Tricia, Brandon, MS (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:02:35 PM)
Our Thoughts and prayers go out for you and your family. Your Son was a Hero. My brother will leave for Iraq in Febuary for a year long duty. He states that he is Against the war and the decisions made by president Bush and his staff. However he will go and fight for his Country. Thats what is so special about the United States.Your son will remain in our hearts and prayers.
Paul Leon, SanJuan Capistrano California (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:02:56 PM)
Dear Elaine,
No words can comfort the pain you are going through. However you will always have the solace in knowing that your son Robert did his best with the best of intentions for this country. Hopefully you will see a little of him in his three children along with memories which will last a lifetime. You will be in our prayers.
Girish Joshi, Palo Alto, CA (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:02:56 PM)
I'm very sorry, I feel your pain. I give you my deepest sympathy. At least your son is in a better place now. I'm sorry you went through losing your home and your son, it must be hard.
Alison, Cherry Hill, NJ (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:02:57 PM)
As someone that has not lost a child, I can not begin to comprehend the depth at which this pains you. Please accept my deepest sympathy and wishes that you and your family are able to regain the strength that has been torn away. As your son was a soldier he understood the risks that he may make the ultimate sacrifice. None of us wish that we, our children or family are "The one" to make that sacrifice, but unbeknown to the population, Coalition is making a HUGE difference in IRAQ. I only wished that you as a parent could actually see the real truth of your son’s actions. And the life that children in Iraq are now experiencing.
God bless you and your family during this time of sorrow.
Loretta Smith (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:03:06 PM)
God bless your son for his courage and support for all of us. He is a hero. My heart goes out to you and all his family. I lost my son at age 32just 3 short years ago(not to war)...I know the grief a mother goes through. I will be praying daily for you...God is our comforter and always present, even in our darkest moments.
Willene Barraza, Jasper, GA (Sent Nov 4, 2005 3:03:15 PM)
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